Yes, there is.
Only, it wasn't during the workout that I found myself suddenly tearing up.
It was afterwards.
As we, (the cast and I), finished the football drills at the conclusion of my very first go at P90X Plyo, I suddenly felt this well of emotion. I was overwhelmed. And then, just like that I cried a little.
(That's like saying, "I pee'd a little" or "I'm a little bit pregnant." No. I cried. I admit it. Full-blown tears)
Why?
BECAUSE I DID IT.
I have been looking at P90X infomercials for YEARS. I NEVER THOUGHT I COULD DO IT.
- I don't have the time.
- I have two children.
- It's too hard.
- I don't have the equipment.
- I can't workout at home.
- It's too expensive.
- I'm 38.
- I'm 39.
- I'm 40.
Sure, I had to stop briefly during the 58 minutes of jumping and leaping and squatting and, yes, audibly grunting. But what I discovered was an internal drive to get in those deep breaths, a little water, and then, JUMP BACK IN. OK, so I had to slow down the pace at some points, but I finished. Strong.
And then the tears came. As a complete surprise to me, I might add. But just as quickly as they came, did I realize WHY they came.
The tears were due to a HUGE TRUTH about myself.
I have kicked an enormous habit. What habit? The habit of falling into a sedentary lifestyle? (For that was the path I was choosing). No, that's too easy of an answer. This truth goes much deeper.
The habit, my friends, was one that I think I've carried around all my life. That being:
The habit of approaching challenges with the immediate belief that I couldn't possibly conquer the looming task before me due to one thing or another.
I'm a pretty confident person - and still, I've always carried this load either on one shoulder, or the other. Sometimes both. And while I may have plodded through anyway, the fear has always lingered. At times, the load would win - stopping me from trying something new.
Due to my experience with Team Beachbody, ChaLEAN Extreme, and now P90X (all two days of it), I think I have kicked "I can't" from the auto-pilot position in my life. The physical success, and the business success from my journey with this company has actually fanned out into other areas of my life as well.
- I'm submitting writing pieces for freelance gigs more often.
- I'm auditioning for my first play since Zane was born.
The auto-response of "I can't" is such a sucky place to be.
It infringes on LIFE.
So, today, while panting, gulping water, and bending over to catch my breath, I cried.
Yeah, Plyo hurt.
And yet, that hour of physical exertion, felt a whole heck of a lot better than living with the beliefs I used to house in this body of mine.
Please, if you don't want me telling you that you CAN do it - don't ask. I'll only annoy you with my answer. Someone else put it this way . . .
"What do you REALLY want? Sympathy? Or a Solution?"
I CHOSE a solution.
And then cried like a baby.
